Commit to the Lord whatever you do, and He will establish your plans. In all your ways acknowledge HIM and He will make your paths straight.
— Proverbs 5:3
— Proverbs 5:3
Hebrews. 12:1-2, “Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles, and let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us. Let us fix our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of our faith.”
We have a great heritage in the church, faithful followers of Jesus who have suffered and endured much. In their pain and suffering they have sought wisdom and understanding of the great love of God. They have left markers along the trail to guide our ways. Joni Erickson Tada has suffered much and is now suffering with cancer. She has her bad days like everyone else. Ken, her husband of 30 years is her caregiver as well. They have help, but he carries a primary responsibility. Ken suffered from depression, and he loves Joni very much. Wouldn’t it be interesting to be in a caregiver support group with Ken. He knew up front in their marriage that Joni had special needs. He knowingly choose to link his life to hers. They have a book coming out in April they have written together called, “Joni & Ken: An Untold Love Story. When Joni was diagnosed with cancer Ken was going through a spiritual transformation of his own. Their new book is about sharing, with honesty, the highs and lows of their 30-year marriage and how, as each looked to God to find strength to carry on. They also found themselves drawing closer, in God’s perfect love triangle. That triangle with God makes them strong. Like the three cords in Ecclesiastes 4:12 that are not easily broken we are strengthened by God in our life. So fix your eyes on Jesus with the eyes of faith. You will learn so much about precious blessings in the wonders God can reveal. It will make you stronger. You will be a greater blessing to the one who needs your love and care. As you live in close contact with Jesus, the Light of Jesus’s presence will filter through you to bless others. Intersperse peaceful interludes with Jesus throughout your day. God bless, Tom
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It is time for an attitude check. What am I talking about? Well how is your attitude about being a caregiver.
Attitude definition: A complex mental state involving beliefs, feelings, values and dispositions to act in a certain way. How does a Christian caregiver do an attitude check? Let's look at Paul's words. “And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love Him, who have been called according to His purpose.” Rom. 8:28. May I suggest we focus on the word “CALL” in these words. You are CALLED! This is such an important word for Christian caregivers to acknowledge. You are not a victim. You are not being punished. You are called. It is so helpful to see your caregiving role as a Christian calling because it changes everything. It changes your attitude. It changes your approach. God has called you. Think about that. I know you didn’t ask for it. Neither did Jonah, Peter, Paul. Jesus words to “Follow Me” means Jesus has a direction he wants us to go in our lives. We are called to be servants and you are called to be a servant in a specific circumstance. Jesus’s promise to us in the end of Matthew’s gospel are the words, “I will be with you always, even to the end of the age.” Jesus has called you to be a caregiver. He promises to be with you. We are called according to His purposes and he will reveal those purposes more completely over time. We may not understand His purposes at this time, but scripture says God works for the good. I have been reading a number of books about the stories of caregivers. Yes, it is hard and sometimes very hard. However, the stories are about the blessings and learnings these caregivers received. He will bless you and you will learn much. Being called by God also means God has a stake in your caregiving and God will provide. I don’t know how He will do it or when He will do it, but I believe He will do it. He promises to do it. He can do it. You are connected to the right source. There is a condition. The scripture says, “to those who love Him”. This love is not a feeling, this love is an action. We love God by talking to Him, by worshipping Him, by praising Him and by blessing Him. As the hymn writer learned to love God by writing, “Bless the Lord, O my soul and all that is within me, bless His Holy name.” Even secular research has discovered that attitude is important in caregivers. See the attached link titled, Utah researchers find caregivers' attitudes critical in Alzheimer's disease progression http://www.deseretnews.com/article/865571095/Utah-researchers-find-caregivers-attitudes-critical-in-Alzheimers-disease-progression.html So how is your attitude? Allow your faith to draw your attitude closer to the mind of Christ in your Christian caregiving. Romans 8:28 "And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love Him, who have been "called" according to His purpose."
Caregiving is a loving responsibility, but it can be stressful and hard work. How we think about having the responsibility of caregiving can change everything. Having the mind of Christ in us can make a huge difference. We can see our responsibility as a duty, obligation or as God placing a "Calling" on our lives. If God calls us to this purpose, we can look to God to provide what we need. Our first Christian Caregiver Support Group meets at Christ Lutheran Church in Overland Park, KS on Sunday afternoons at 4;00. Contact Tom Frommer (913) 732-0703 for more information. God's blessings! Karen and I have our devotion time together most mornings. We lift up in prayer family and friends and we pray for you also. This morning we read from Sarah Young’s book a meditation appropriate for the caregiver. I want to share with you. Her book is called “Jesus Calling.” It is written like God is personally speaking to us each morning.
“My Face is shining upon you, beaming out Peace that transcends understanding. You are surrounded by a sea of problems, but you are face to Face with Me, your Peace. As long as you focus on Me, you are safe. If you gaze too long at the myriad problems around you, you will sink under the weight of you burdens. When you start to sink, simply call out “Help me, Jesus!” and I will life you up. The closer you live to Me, the safer you are. Circumstances around you are undulating, and there are treacherous-looking waves in the distance. Fix you eyes on Me, the One who never changes. By the time those waves reach you, they will have shrunk to proportions of My design. I am always beside you, helping you face today’s waves. The future is a phantom, seeking to spook you. Laugh at the future! Stay close to Me”. Phil 4:7; Matt 14:30; Heb. 12:2. May this be true for you. Our first meeting of the Christian Caregiver Support Ministry brought 18 precious people. With the courage to open themselves to others and respond to the Christian invitation to come (Matt. 11:28) they came, weary and heavy burdened, to seek the fellowship of others traveling on the path of being a caregiver in some special way. Some were caring for adults and some children. Together we seek the hope and healing that Jesus gives in the Body of Christ. Jesus knocks on our door in our worry, hurts, fears and inadequacies and says He will fellowship with us and be with us. We just need to stop and pray and share with HIM. I believe Jesus has been there for me and will be there for each person that comes to Him. We have only taken one step in helping one another. Listening is important. There is so much more to share and stories to be heard. My prayer this week is that the Word of scripture will be heard (listened to) as a personal, specific and comforting word addressing the hearts of each person. It is in our need that the Word speaks to us. Tom Frommer
Tomorrow we begin our first Christian Caregiver Support Group and I am very excited and hopeful. I have been in the Fog and down in the pit. Caregivers can have a very stressful time. Just to come to a support group is a big change and hard to do. So I pray for all those God will send. I pray that they might find a place of understanding. I pray that we all will connect with God in a deeper way. I pray that they will find in our group a place of sanctuary and rest as well as guidance in the journey. I pray that the will hear scripture speaking directly to their hearts. I pray that God will be with us. Scripture promise that is on my mind is Exodus 33:14, “My Presence will go with you, and I will give you rest.” May this scripture be personal for all of us tomorrow afternoon. Tom
Jesus says, “Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest.”
I know being a caregiver can be stressful. It is not easy when you are taken for granted. Much of the work you do may not be appreciated. You must deal with anger and demands aimed at you. You will grow to understand more of what I was showing you when I washed my disciples feet. You even take ME for granted and don’t share your appreciation for the things I do for you. You even get angry with ME and shout out a prayer for me to do something. I don’t mind. I love you and want to share this caregiving with you. Trust in ME. I understand more than you understand. I am also inviting the person you are caring for to come to me with their losses, grief, anger and suffering. I care for them, too. I will show you the way. I will lead my people to be with you and help you. I will open doors you did not think of. Yes, you will have stress, decision and challenges. I am not going to remove this work from you. But I will lead you to the place of peace and rest that is in, with and under your work. I grant you a Sabbath, a time away for you to be cared for and listened to, a time to learn from ME. My brothers and sisters with similar challenges and stresses will be meeting at Christ Lutheran Church this Sunday, Jan 13 at 4:00pm to receive support in their caregiver calling and I invite you to be with them. You won’t have to read books. You won’t have any new demands place on you. You won’t have any assignments. I just want you to be with loving people who will listen to you in MY name and give you MY love and care. I understand if you cannot come every week. But my brothers and sisters will be there for you on the weeks you can come to this Sabbath time for caregivers. See Matthew 11:25-30 Christ Lutheran Church 11720 Nieman Rd Overland Park, Kansas 66210 913-345-9700 When my dad died almost two years ago my life changed dramatically. My parents were four months shy of a seventy year marriage. They had many health problems, but the two together still barely managed to have a somewhat functioning household. But my dads falls were becoming more frequent and he was sleeping most of the night and day. My mom would wake him at 3:00 in the afternoon for their "happy hour." That constituted most of their conversation time. Then my dad died.
My mom was in shock. We were all in shock. They lived about 250 miles from us. We (Karen, my wife and Micah, my son) planned to visit them for the weekend. My dad had fallen the morning we left San Antonio to drive to the Texas valley and had to be taken to the hospital. We visited my dad several times that weekend. Sunday noon we left to go back to San Antonio. My dad was in less pain and doing better. As we arrived close to the outskirts of San Antonio my mom called my cell phone to let us know that Dad had died. It was a disbelieving and eerie feeling. My dad had died. We told my mom we would come back. My brother lived in Houston. I told my mother I would contact him to see if he would come with us. He is a disabled vet. He said his legs were too bad to travel. We went back down to the valley. I was surprised at what I found. More later |
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Sue Brettmann RN has been devoted to Caregiving both in her career as an RN, Parish Nurse and caring for her aging parents through the last 40 plus years. She has experience in trauma, home care and hospice. Her strong faith walk and relationship with Christ has always been a part of her care and she is committed to helping others see the gift of Christ in their personal journey's. Archives
October 2021
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